Songs in the Night

When you're trying to fall asleep, laying in the dark with your head on your soft pillow, you attempt to spin your mind into dreams. 

Solitude Reading, a photo by Robert Banh on Flickr.

But then inspiration hits.

A story idea, a recipe you want to try, the perfect Facebook status, a to-do item for tomorrow, a few lines of song, someone you need to contact, the inspiration for a photograph...it hits just as sleep comes to claim you.

And you have to write it down or else you'll forget it.

Isn't it interesting that sometimes our brightest insights come whenever we're doing something else?

Message in a Bottle

I wondered how a camera's sensor reproduces the world around us, both in shape and color. Then I looked at a plastic water bottle and noticed how it reflected the sunlight and the hazy blue sky and the shadowy interior of my car. 

water bottle, a photo by Muffet on Flickr.

That was an epiphany. 

I realized that not only can a camera reproduce the world, but quiet lakes, eyeglasses, and water bottles do too. Every time I look in the bathroom mirror I'm seeing a reflection of the world around me—my bathroom, perfectly reproduced on a sheet of silver-backed glass. 

So I ask myself, why doesn't everything reflect? And then another epiphany: everything does reflect. Everything my eye sees is only visible because it reflects light.* That green tree isn't inherently green; it's actually everything but green so that it reflects back green light and that's why I see. A strawberry is red because it's reflecting back red light, etc. So every blade of grass, every coffee maker, every fire hydrant, every necklace, is just a reflection—

the world is a reflection. 

How the World is Stealing Our Wonder

Sometimes I wonder about my life. I lead a small life—well, valuable, but small—and sometimes I wonder, do I do it because I like it, or because I haven't been brave? So much of what I see reminds me of something I read in a book, when shouldn't it be the other way around? 

-You've Got Mail 

When I took my first-ever airplane trip, I expected to be amazed. I really thought that I would be knocked off my feet, thrilled, utterly flabbergasted by the completely unique experience of flying above the clouds, soaring so much higher than I'd ever been in my life. 


I buckled into my seat before takeoff, a bit apprehensive, then prepared myself for the roller-coaster feeling. It came, my stomach dropped, and we were in the air. When I looked out the window, the first word that came to mind was patchwork. The ground below looked like a patchwork quilt. And it immediately occurred to me how many times that word had been used in connection with flying. Books, magazines, movies, other people, they all describe the fields looking like patchwork.


This was the first disturbing thing. What followed was a few minutes of frustration as I tried to describe what I was seeing in completely original terms. It was hard. Every phrase that came to mind sounded hackneyed and cliche. The real shock was that even what I was seeing with my own eyes seemed not only familiar, but old. How many photos had I seen of the clouds? How many images of soaring wings? Dozens? Hundreds? It seemed so unfair that my first experience was almost spoiled because I had already experienced flying through blog posts, books, movies, etc. There was so little mystery, so little wonder.

Surrendering Dreams

I don't usually respond to posts on other blogs, but this is an exception. One of the Altogether Separate community members recently sent me to a post by Miss Raquel over at the God's Daughter blog. She told the story of a fellow Christian blogger who died in May, leaving a striking legacy behind him.


In the last blog post that he published, Joshua Steven Eddy wrote about the need to surrender everything— even those beautiful dreams that we hold close to our hearts—to the Lord. His words were inspiring:

To surrender a precious dream is a fearful thing, but to pursue anything but the full measure of the glory of God’s love is a wasted life.

About two weeks after he wrote this, Joshua was killed in a hiking accident. 

Book Review: Radical

“We are settling for a Christianity that revolves around catering to ourselves when the central message of Christianity is actually about abandoning ourselves.” 

― David Platt, Radical: Taking Back Your Faith from the American Dream

Poverty. Persecution. Suffering. Addiction. Darkness. These are things that consume our world, hold happiness in a stranglehold, and suck the life out of billions of people. This planet we call home is riddled with pain, and those of us who are blessed enough to be removed from such horrors as starvation, disease, and filth so easily ignore it all. It is so easy to sit inside our air conditioned houses on cushy couches and make grandiose plans about our futures.

I do not usually read books that I have never heard anything about, but when I saw a book titled Radical: Taking Back Your Faith From the American Dream, I had to check it out. What I found was a gripping, convicting, inspiring call to action that continues to fill my mind and heart with questions and controversies.

Pain of Change

Today I was thinking about exercise--one of the few things I come close to loathing. Some people seem to get a strange high out of beating up their bodies and sweating and smelling and aching. I don't. I've been looking into the BodyRock.tv "home workout movement" (something that a friend of mine is passionate about), and found myself wishing for an exercise program that wasn't so hard and so long, and that didn't hurt so much.

Guess what: nothing is going to change if it doesn't hurt.

The reason exercise hurts is because it's changing something inside your body. If I want to change the size of my biceps or the shape of my abs or the look of my legs, I've got to hurt first. If you're not hurting, you're not changing. Maybe exercise doesn't hurt you, but something has to (self-discipline, prioritization, donating time, sticking it out, growing). 

One more thought, "We change our behavior when the pain of staying the same becomes greater than the pain of changing" (Henry Cloud). What do you want to change in your life, and how will it hurt to do that?

AmbassadorSummit_1372, a photo by lululemon athletica on Flickr.

Marinating in Insanity

y2.d40 | worry lines, a photo by B Rosen on Flickr.

I just heard this phrase used in the context of an interview* and was immediately hooked. The context was someone taking the leap from steady employment to entrepreneurship, and he was scared stiff thinking of all the terrible possibilities. What if this fails? What if I'm wrecking my future? What if my parents are right to be skeptical? He basted himself with the juices of fear for years. 

Then he took the leap. In a cold sweat, with the doubt of coworkers ringing in his ears, he turned in his two-week notice and leapt into the world of freelance design. The rest, as they say, is success. He is now doing very well for himself, is incredibly good at what he does, works with clients around the world (some big names, I might add), and spends $0 on marketing--it's all word of mouth from satisfied customers.

This isn't just a business success story, though, it's a wake-up call for all of us who have been marinating in our own insanities: the insanities of worry, doubt, worst-case-scenarios, and second guessing. What does marination do? The acids of a marinade break down the tissues in raw meat, tenderizing it, making it mushy. What will happen if you marinade in the insanity of uninformed, unnecessary fear? You'll break down. You'll eventually get so soft and muddle-headed that you won't be able to make any progress. Your wings will collapse before you even try to take flight.

Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.

Dale Carnegie

Note to self: Get out there and stop worrying about what might happen.

*This interview was on an awesome podcast, Coach Radio, with Justin Lukasavige (coachradio.tv) and Charlie Pabst (charfishdesign.com). 

My Bucket List In Progress

A couple months ago I wrote a post about bucket lists, where I wrote about lifelong goals, living to the fullest, the magic of thinking big, etc. Well, I have since created a list of my own. 

In case you're not familiar with Heritage Makers, it's an awesome online program that gives you the ability to create gorgeous custom storybooks, calendars, canvas prints, greeting cards, invitations, and even personalized playing cards (watch the video introduction here). I used HM to create a 14x11 poster of my bucket list (see the image above) to frame and hang on the wall above my bed as a reminder of my goals.

I call this my "Bucket List in Progress" because it is by no means a concrete thing. I've listed such goals as "write a textbook" and "own a Cavalier King Charles Spaniel" that I may not want to do someday for a myriad of reasons. But this is an outline, a rough sketch, something to aim for. I intend to alter it every few years to accommodate new goals and cross out the ones I've already accomplished, honing it to a razor-sharp edge of intention. 

So without further ado I present to you my current bucket list, with goals listed in no particular order: 

The old streets of Saltaire Village, a photo by Paul Stevenson on Flickr.

1.       Keep it simple

2.       Stay under 130 lbs.

3.       Deep relationships

4.       Create a self-study program for lifelong learning

5.       Find or create work that I love

6.       Live in England

7.       Make a friend in every European country

8.       Fall in love

9.       Discover my reasons for living

10.   Work for myself

11.   Get good at tennis

12.   Ride a horse “in the rough”

Les Miserables West End, a photo by mart wegman on Flickr.

13.   Learn another language

14.   See a show on Broadway/the West End

15.   Learn to dance

Grayson.., a photo by Bruce Tuten on Flickr.

16.   Scuba dive in a coral reef

17.   Sleep in a British castle

18.   Own a Cavalier King Charles Spaniel

19.   Spread the Gospel

20.   Always tithe at least 10%

21.   Become influential in a godly ministry

It is Finished, a photo by abcdz2000 on Flickr.

22.   See the Northern Lights

23.   Visit

•        The British Museum

•        The Uffizi Gallery

•        The Smithsonian

•        The Louvre

24.   Live at least six months in a foreign country

25.   Tour New England

26.   Live in my “dream cottage” (a white cottage on a New England beach)

27.   Create a lovely garden

cutting loose, a photo by SqueakyMarmot on Flickr.

28.   Become a semi-professional photographer

29.   Become a connoisseur

30.   Read the complete works of Shakespeare

31.   Discover my strengths, weaknesses, passions, and gifts

32.   Never take on a lifestyle of debt

33.   Be a major influence in a child’s life

34.   Prison ministry

35.   Become an expert

36.   Win a prestigious blog award

37.   Write a textbook or study guide

Flags!, a photo by Paul Kehrer on Flickr.

38.   Be a New York Times bestselling author

39.   Go to a Green Bay Packer Game

40.   Make mistakes

41.   Learn to not take offense

And what is your personal opinion of these goals? Do you have a bucket list of your own? Are you willing to post it for the world to see?

Reading: Who Will You Become?

They say that you will be the same person in five years as you are today except for the people you meet and the books you read. It can be (but is not necessarily) difficult to determine which people you will meet. It is, however, the matter of a few mouse clicks to determine exactly which books you will read in the coming days, months, and years. There are millions of books are at your fingertips thanks to sites like Amazon.com, and you haven't an excuse in the world not to buy, beg, borrow, or steal something that could possibly revolutionize your life for the better. 

Anne Lamott, author of such works as Bird by Bird and Traveling Mercies, said that her life was changed by The Only Dance There Is by Ram Dass. U.S. Senator John McCain says that Ernest Hemingway's For Whom The Bell Tolls "seized (his) attention." World-famous career coach Dan Miller credits Earl Nightingale's book The Strangest Secret as giving him the vision to go beyond his family's Mennonite farm to pursue an amazing life. 

Which books will you read before the end of the year?  

If you look at the next five books on your reading list, you will find an uncannily accurate foretelling of the kind of person you will soon be. If you don't have a reading list, the same holds true.

Who might I be after reading these books?

1. A Million Miles in a Thousand Years by Donald Miller = a better Christian
2. Notes From a Small Island by Bill Bryson = a better Anglophile
3. Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoevsky = someone with a better understanding of social alienation, Nihilism, and the idea of the superman
4. Crush It! by Gary Vaynerchuk = a social-media-savvy girl who cashes in on her passion
5. On Writing by Stephen King = a better writer

Read about The Book That Changed My Life at Suite101.

Notturno, a photo by gualtiero on Flickr.

LIFE

“Life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all.”

Helen Keller

"If you're bored with life - or you don't get up every morning with a burning desire to do things - you don't have enough goals."

Lou Holtz

“Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in one pretty and well-preserved piece, but to skid across the line broadside, thoroughly used up, worn out, leaking oil, shouting GERONIMO!”

Attributed to Bill McKenna

Learning to Fail

My first "vlog post". You might think it's awful, but that just proves my point!

A Bucket List

No, I don't want to skydive. Sorry.

I must have heard the term “bucket list” at least four times in one day. It’s the title of an Oscar award winning movie, but more than that is a popular concept among positive-thinking, life-changing, entrepreneurship-type blogs and podcasts. It’s the idea that you should make up a list of a hundred, fifty, or even a dozen things that you want to do before you kick the proverbial bucket. Basically you ask yourself, “If I was lying on my deathbed right now, what would I regret not doing?”

Setting down your lifetime goals is such an important task, I think it would be hard to overstate it. Not that you have to map out exactly what you’ll be doing in February 2028, but not even setting a few major goals on paper is like going out on a grand adventure without so much as a compass. You might not need a road map complete with little symbols for every rest stop, but a list of “big rocks” gives you landmarks to help you keep track along the way, so that you don’t get to the end of a year—God forbid, the end of your life—and say, “Gosh, I didn’t really do much that was worthwhile and life-changing.”

For me this is a very big list. I’ve yet to put in down in writing, though; at the moment it’s just a haphazard, unformed idea of uninitiated opportunities and vague dreams. I have a feeling that my list (when I actually write it) will be less a series of concrete goals and more a collection of abstract experiences—serving God, building solid relationships, a lifestyle of continual learning, fulfilling work, helping others, creating something beautiful, etcetera. However, here are some solid goals I’ve come up with so far:

• Living in England (yes, spending 2 whole months at a Bible school would count, in my opinion)
• Making at least one friend in every country in Europe (yes, I know that there are 52)
• Publishing a book (fiction or nonfiction, and if through self-publishing I’d like to sell several thousand copies)
• Falling in love (if that’s God’s will)
• Discover my passion and reason for living (no biggie, right?)
• Work for myself (and do more than survive)

That’s it for now. What about you? Do you have some half-formed ideas, are you completely clueless, or are you ahead of the game and have your list all written out already? I challenge you bloggers to put some time, spiritual energy, and serious thought into your own bucket list, then post it on your own blog. Then you can link to your post in the comment section of this post. I’d love to see what some of you want to accomplish.

And remember, it’s never too late to start! In 1966 Lou Holtz was just an unemployed, penniless assistant-coach. He read the book The Magic of Thinking Big and then sat down to write out a list of 107 things he wanted to do before he died. Years later he has retired from a phenomenal football coaching career (2x coach of the year), and he's accomplished at least 85 of those goals so far.

I can’t wait to see what you come up with! 

P.S. Here are 1,000 ideas for your bucket list!

One giant leap for Matt! (one small step for mankind), a photo by Muddy Funkster on Flickr.

Winning IS Everything

"Winning isn't everything; it's the only thing."

                                                   -Henry Russell "Red" Sanders

I recently heard this quote lambasted. "Then what's the point of life?", people say, "To beat everybody else and make yourself important? How lame and inhuman." In my opinion, though, this quote doesn't have to be translated like that.

Sure, it was spoken in a competitive football context, where you winning means that someone else has to lose. But what's the point of football if it isn't to win? As the great Vince Lombardi of the Green Bay Packers once said, "If winning isn't everything, why do they keep score?" Good point, Vince. 

So what is the point of your life? What do you want to win? If your goal is to smash the "competition" into the ground and put yourself on top then certainly that isn't honorable and you've probably got your priorities out of whack. But what if your aim is to be the greatest daughter that you can be? To help as many people as you can? To follow Christ in everything? In that case falling short isn't going to do you any favors. Coming in at second place isn't an option. 

Too often we get hung up on the idea that our win equals another person's loss. That's simply not true! George Bernard Shaw supposedly said, "If you have an apple and I have an apple and we exchange these apples then you and I will still each have one apple.  But if you have an idea and I have an idea and we exchange these ideas, then each of us will have two ideas." That's how life works in the real world. 

So don't be afraid to win! You being a success doesn't drag other people down. If you're not winning, who is?

Finish line, a photo by ukanda on Flickr.

A Life With Wings

I'm asking for a show of hands: how many of you would love to live as mediocre a life as possible? 

OK, now that those people have been escorted out of the blogosphere, I'll turn to the rest of you normal ones. What is the point of living your one life if it's boring, pointless, or just plain stupid? Some people live like they're trying their best to be a cautionary tale!

Don't be that guy.

The motto behind living "a life with wings" is to fly as far as possible away from the mediocre and toward a God who has the whole world in his hands. What does a life like that look like? Here are a few pointers: 

1. It is driven by a passion. Floating aimlessly through life will not give you the best results (unless you're Forrest Gump).
2. It is goal oriented. Not fluffy dreams, not hopeless resolutions, just concrete goals. 
3. It is full of meaningful relationships. What is the point of a life lived alone? No man is an island.
4. Take baby steps and enjoy the journey. Every day can have something wonderful, you just have to find it.
5. Expect miracles. Don't just believe in them, look for them around every corner!
6. Live like you were dying. Think about it. What would you do? Now make that a priority. 
7. Abandon yourself to God. Hold nothing back and trust him completely. What do you have to lose?

I'm just starting my life "for real". I've always been a kid before, but things are going to get very serious very soon. I will have the chance to forge my own life story, my own destiny and future. I can put it into God's hands, I can follow his will, or I can go my own way. I can live for the moment, I can live for the past, I can live for the future. There are choices to be made--choices we all have to make every day of our lives. 

"Always live your life with your biography in mind." —Gareth van Meer

Would you be interested in reading your own biography if you died right now? If not, change something! Stop existing and start living. Start living a life with wings!

The Beating Of Wings, a photo by ammgramm on Flickr.

Live Like You Were Kind-of-Dying

Live like you'll die tomorrow, a photo by Mell P on Flickr. http://melissapetrie.com/zenphoto/

No doubt you've heard that Tim McGraw song about the man who learned his time on earth was short: 

I went skydiving,
I went rocky mountain climbing,
I went two point seven seconds on a bull named Fu Man Chu.
And I loved deeper,
And I spoke sweeter,
And I gave forgiveness I'd been denyin'.
And he said some day I hope you get the chance
To live like you were dyin'. 

It's an inspiring sentiment, but the truth is that most of us can't live exactly like we would if we were really dying. The whole point of that, after all, is to take risks and do what we really want to do because there won't be any consequences: we'll be dead long before the repercussions hit. But when you aren't dying there are certain consequences. 

For example: if I were to be diagnosed with terminal cancer right now I would probably take out a huge loan and take a tour of Europe. I would see the cathedrals, dream in the castles, eat the regional cuisine, chat with the locals; I'd make it the trip of a lifetime. Oh, and I would never clean the toilet. But if I did that right now you know what would happen: I'd be stuck with a whopping big loan which would make the next couple decades pretty miserable, and I'd have disgusting toilets.

So maybe we can't follow that cliche old phrase to the letter, but we can "kinda" do it. We can apply it to the little, everyday things. Goals like "loving deeper" and "speaking sweeter" don't take much money to accomplish. They just take a lot of grace and willpower.

Have you ever watched the movie Last Holiday? If not, I highly recommend it. It's the story of a woman who believes she only has three weeks left to live, and goes to Europe to find life and love for the first time. It's hilarious and touching, and can bring home some very weighty concepts. (Like, "The secret to life is butter.")

So go out there right now, find out what your passion is, what your dreams are, who you are, and make it happen. Then tell me all about it!

Leap of Faith

Leap of Faith, originally uploaded by eatbitter.

Ideas are cheap and easy. Everyone has them, they're practically lying around for the taking. Just today I was thinking that someone should invent a fluorescent light tube with edges--like a rectangular prism--so that they wouldn't roll off of things so easily. Stupid, I know, but it could possibly inspire the right kind of person to go out there and make a lot of money with a similar concept.


But this doesn't just apply to work, inventions, and new year's resolutions--it's actually critical to our faith.  

Why Fairy Tales?

"It was when I was happiest that I longed most...The sweetest thing in all my life has been the longing...to find the place where all the beauty came from."

-C.S. Lewis, Till We All Have Faces

What is it about fairy tales that entrances us and makes us pine for "happy ever after"? We see Cinderella step gracefully into her carriage, feel our hearts race as Gaston and the Beast battle it out on the castle roofs, and sympathize with Aurora's sense of romance and isolation. We're immediately wrapped up in the music, mystery, and magic of a splendid storybook adventure.


Despite the outright satire in the movie Enchanted, I still get a silly little thrill when I hear them sing about "true love's kiss". It's a film that almost makes fun of Disney fairy tales, and yet it's a beautiful fairy tale in itself. As Mom and I watched the credits roll last Sunday night I could hear her sighing next to me, "Isn't it a pity that life isn't like a fairy tale?"


That nearly broke my heart, because it is so true. It is a pity. I want to be like Giselle--I want to sing a little ditty and have woodland creatures appear to do my bidding; I want to meet a devastatingly handsome man (or two) who is madly in love with me; I want everything to blossom at my touch and be eternally beautiful and contented.

I think that everyone (or every girl and woman, rather) wants to be a princess: a daring, independent damsel with a brain of her own who just so happens to fall into distress and is saved by a hunky prince. It's the longing for adventure, romance, and--more than that. 

Is Disney to blame for our longings, or are their "princess stories" just a symptom of something deeper?

Beauty for Ashes

Does this picture shock you? Can you imagine looking like this? This is the face of a girl who gave more than most of us could ever dream of giving, all for her Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. And she is still smiling. Below are portions of a blog post from jcrobertsspot.blogspot.com that express my sentiments perfectly:


I receive a monthly newsletter from The Voice of the Martyrs (if you don't receive it, I recommend you contact them to do so - it's free - www.persecution.com). This month, the cover is a picture of a woman, Yubelina, from Indonesia. She was burned in an attack by Muslims on her Christian village.

But she is smiling. A huge smile. Joy radiates from her. Why?? She must receive stares. Children are probably afraid of her. The world would call her damaged. Ugly.

Yubelina has figured out where her identity lies. She is a treasured child of the King. She has traded "a beautiful headdress instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning" (Isa. 61:3). Her smile reveals Jesus.

Yubelina is beautiful. I guarantee she has a joy, a contentment, that no name-brand, trendy clothing; no perfect haircut & makeup; no flawless skin or toned body can bring.

I want to be beautiful like that. I want my face to shine like Moses, because I have been in the presence of God. I want my treasure to lie in heaven & not in the tangible, the material. I want to be joyful & content & full of peace.

Jesus, make it so.

"I will greatly rejoice in the Lord; my soul shall exult in my God, for He has clothed me with the garments of salvation; He has covered me with the robe of righteousness, as a bridegroom decks himself like a priest with a beautiful headdress, and as a bride adorns herself with her jewels." 

-Isaiah 61:10

Dream-Resolution-Goal

New Year's Resolution: 36/365, originally uploaded by SashaW.

• Dream: ambition--a cherished desire
• Resolution: a decision to do something or to behave in a certain manner
• Goal: a projected state of affairs that a person or a system plans or intends to achieve

It all begins with a dream. I want to go to England. I want to study biology. I want to get married. I want to garden more. These cherished desires float around in our minds, go from frequent thoughts to irresistible daydreams, and stay with us for years. 

But dreams don't come true just because Disney says so.

Dreams come true because they solidify into resolutions, and we make the conscious decision to turn that unconscious thought into action. This is the stuff of the New Year. For the first week or two we complain less, eat healthier, spend more time with family, clean up the house, and keep things in perspective out of sheer willpower.

Then Life Happens.

And all of a sudden you look around and realize that your life is exactly the same as it’s been for the past five years and your resolutions lie in heaps of rubble ‘round your ears. Why? In short: resolutions simply don’t cut it. They are pie in the sky, just a little more practical than daydreams.